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Transcript of a meeting between The Author and Jazz.
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They sit almost alone in a quiet cafe. Make certain note that the weather (temperature) is "fine". This is important. The weather is neither too hot, nor too cold. The weather is just "fine".
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Me: Hey.
Jazz: ...hey.
Me: What's up. Thanks for coming out to see me, it's been a while. Hey...are you ok? You're all over the place.
Jazz: Huh...what...what do you mean?
Me: You're all over the place. Your shit is everywhere. You can't even look me straight in the eyes. What the hell is wrong with you. You been drinking?
Jazz: Shit no. Drinking? What the hell are you talking about. This is a cafe and it be almost not 10 what 8:30 in the AM and you think i been drinkin'? I am looking directly at you and there is a totally sweet car over ther...shit is that the time...god i am hungry...trees are some fine ass niggers...
Me: Shit yes. Drinking. Sit down man, i'll order you a water. You're sweating man, have you taken anything?
Jazz: Noooooo man, i am coool...you're the one who is paranoid man just chill out for a bit yeah? Hmmm, I have been perspiring a bit haven't I. Feeling this cool breeze blow through now, my man. Real cool. I'm going to sit here, lay back, sip this nice cool water. What you callin' me out for anyways brother? You call me out and you go all Questioning Non-Stop on my ass when i just want to chill...
Me: Just wanted to see you again. It's been a while and last time we saw each other we didn't get on so well...
Jazz: What you talking about brother? We cool. Got this nice water here and this nice breeze blowin' through. We cool.
Me: Yeah
Jazz: ...We cool.
Me: Yeah. Yeah, i see all those things now. I guess. I mean, we ARE cool. No wait you're right...this feels good, having you here, relaxing... It was a good idea to get you out my man. Might order me some nice cool wate...
Jazz: WHAT you TAAAALKIN' about FOOOOLLlll? It is HOT. HOT my man i feel like i am STRANGLIN' or bein the STRANGLIN' in here! This water is BULLSHIT! Oh man i see some BRICKS over there they be SWEATIN' like watermelon PIE!
Me: Oh Christ.
Jazz: I don't want no stinkin' water this shit is fo' FOOLS. YOU a fool you dragin' me out here in WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. LAMPOST is LAMP LIGHTING. STAGE FRIGHTENIN'!
Me: This is exactly what happened last time. Why are you yelling like some fucking mad-man. We were just getting really cool there for a second. I was going to order a water. A nice cool water, remember the water? How cool and nice it was and the breeze? Remember the breeze...
Jazz: EAT yo' DINNA punk ass FOO'!
Me: ...
Jazz: EAT YO' DINNA drunk lass COOL!
Me: Alright i'm leaving. You're shitting me.
Jazz: Whoa, whoa...whoa. What's the matter. What IS the matter? You ain't even got you a water yet you ain't even asked the waiter man for you water. WATER PLEASE ANOTHER WATER. Just calm down my brother and get back in you seat i promise we be cool...feel the breeze WHOA SOLO OUT OF DA MUTHAFUCKIN AiiiRRRiiIIRRRIIRIRIiiiRRRRRRRR GREASE pIPES.
Me: Fuck you, Jazz.
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Jazz.
The relationship we share is often tenuous. We spend alot of time together. By no means do i give you the most of my time, but considering how much time i have, you do alright. It has not been the easiest for us. Well at least for me, it has not been easy. You speak easy and often loudly and i've barely a moment to think about a responce. Your face is often expressionless and hard to read. Jazz you are like a faceless mask. Am i meant to draw in the expression i would most like to see? Am i meant to stare long enough into the white nothing of your mask in order to start seeing swiming stars and then patterns and then God knows? Shit, DOES God know? Have you talked to him about what you're doing? Has he replied with a resounding "Fuck Yes, Jazz! You're Doing It Right!"?.
I am not picking on you. You've been exceptional company on many ocasions. I am just trying to understand you.
You're just more difficult than my other friends. Louder than them. Quieter than them. Faster than them. Slower than them. Some of the things you say, you seem not to think about before saying them. Some of the things you say, they seem so full of purpose and deliberate. You've frightened me. You have calmed me. You have bored me. Oh jesus, how sometimes you have bored me. Some days you manage to best capture the complete random-ness of all things. Sometimes i need structure or i will most surely go insane. Sometimes, jazz, you drive me insane.
Most importantly, i think, you are a challenge.
Jazz, what i am trying to get at is that i think you're a bi-polar spastic, and i love you.
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